2008

It's been neato 2007. We've shared some good times and some bad. Mostly good.

oh, Resolutions? I HAVE NONETH!

I'm sure that '08 will be extraordinary.

Let's hope for the best yo.

Cheers mates.

To-Do List

Winter '07

MUST Do's:

- Dali exhibit at the LACMA
- Murakami exhibit at the MOCA
- Roadtrip to Seattle
- Frequent visits to Amoeba Music.
- Buy a new Nikon DSLR.
- Random trips to explore California.
- Study statistics.

MAYBE Do's:

- Buy a keyboard.
- Familiarize myself with the piano again.
- Buy a camcorder.
- Start up Soju Memoirs.
- Write.
- Vegas?

Dreams

My nights have been filled with INTENSE dreams.

I wake up and my body won't move. Blood rushes and pulsates all over my head during the dreams.

Most of the dreams have something to do with sex. INTENSE SEX. Sometimes it feels like I'm having an intense wet dream.

But there is no evidence of that. At least, not yet.

And if it's not intense sex, then its intense, dramatic situations, like death or murder or suicide.

I...can't explain it. Psychology has taught me nothing. Ha.

Turkeyless Day

My Thanksgiving.

=

Jungle Video + cold supreme pizza from What-A-Lot-A + Kirkland Vitamin Water + Macbook + the musical/movie Hairspray + a couple episodes of 'The King of Queens' + a lot of cleaning.


Hope yours was as good as mine.

I'm gonna get back to watching 'Eagle vs. Shark'.


PS: While watching Hairspray, I had a sudden urge to dance around the store like I was a part of the cast. Then a customer came in.

random thoughts

I wish I grew up in the 60's/70's. Life seemed more exciting back then. Soul music, civil rights, women in dresses.

Family dynamic is complex.

I'm coming off very desperate these days.

Addicted to Starbucks. Once again.

Beer gives me a nice fuzzy feeling.

It's a remarkably nice day today. Sky blue.

Statistics will be the death of me.

There's so much music out there. I'm annoyed that I can't download EVERYTHING.

My library books are late.

Hair grows fast.

LADIESSSS. The Bird and the Bee.

I don't think I'm lonely, but others have said I am.

I'm going overseas.

WHAT THE FUCK.

Since our horribly arduous exam is coming up this Tuesday, our teacher decided to cancel our lab session. Due to this, our class came to an extremely early end.

As I'm leaving the classroom, this cat that I occasionally chat with comes up to me with his usual greeting. He's a white guy. Portly, Jewish, republican, nerdy, Wal-mart-esque attire, and at an even more superficial level, rather unattractive. You might be asking 'Why do you have to point out that he's unattractive? That's rather cold of you.' Well, pay attention sucka, cause I'm about to tell you why.

We start jib-jabbing about the material on the test and the meticulousness of all this shit we covered. He then proceeds to ask me what I'm doing this weekend, and I told him that I'm probably going to be studying my ass off, but other than that, I'm gonna be doing nothing. Then....

Sidenote: You know how psychologists and communication experts say that 90% of all communication is non-verbal? Now, picture the most awkward non-verbal communication signs that an educated individual can pick up when they are in a situation of being asked out by another individual, much like the one described above. I'll give you a few minutes. Okay. Ready? Let's continue.

..he pulls out his phone, saying exactly these words, periods and all.

walmartman: So...um, I was wondering...you know, if you aren't going to be doing anything,...and since you said you will be free and all...you know, if we could..hang out sometime?

(I thought he was talking about a study group. My naivety lead me to say this:)

handsomeman: Sure. We can get together a study group and work shit out.

walmartman: oh...well, we could do that if you want, but i mean, not that. You know, like, just hanging out,..the two of us.

handsomeman: oh....

walmartman: yea..

handsomeman: (still naive) yea whatever man, I'm down for some statistics talk and a beer. My number is (blahbalbhabl)

walmartman: cool. thanks.

handsomeman: Okay. I gotta jet. Take it easy dude.

walmartman: byeeeee.





I left class.

As I started to walk back to my car, it hit me.

I just got hit on.

By a man.

At first, I thought I was being stupid and paranoid. Why would a cat like that be hitting on me? Maybe he just wants friendship. Maybe hes bored and thinks I'll be a cool person to hang out with.

But my years of psychological training, people watching, and awkwardly talking to girls informed me that I knew better. All the signs were there.

WHAT THE FUCK.

Lately, I've only been meeting males. I am being more social this year. I'm talking to a lot of people, making acquaintances, and talking to more women that I would talk to in a decade. BUT YET, I ONLY END UP MAKING FRIENDS WITH MALES AND MEETING MALES.

WHAT THE FUCK.

WHERE ARE THE GIRLS AT!?

Am I really that unattractive to the ladies? Shoot. And why is it that I only meet girls who are married or engaged or in serious, deep relationships, or even worse, 17?!

AND WHY DO I GET HIT ON MY UNATTRACTIVE MALES? AT LEAST HAVE A DECENT LOOKING ONE HIT ON ME SO I CAN THINK TO MYSELF 'OH WOW. THAT MEANS IF I EVER TURN GAY, I COULD PULL A MAN LIKE THAT.'

The conclusions I have reached today are as follows:
1) God hates me
2) I'm not going to get a girl for a while.
3) If I want ass, I need to start enjoying penis in my butt or mouth.
4) God hates me.

Anyway. I basically got asked out by a guy today. This is the 2nd time this has happened to me. Hence, the subject title.

Fin.

Boo

My newly shaven head is influencing my behaviours.

I find myself touching my head, CONSTANTLY. I want to drive with the windows open even though it's colder than a witch tit. I feel this blood burning need to go exercise and train for the big fight, a la Rocky. I feel more....aerodynamic. I think my ears have gotten bigger.

But I like it.

Camera

I miss having a camera.

Will I have to spend my savings on an expensive camera? Should I sacrifice a wonderful yet hypothetical winter retreat for a camera?

Having a camera is a beautiful thang.

Korean.

I got a messed up haircut today.

Enjoy.

For Donald.

I like doing women in the butt.

I like butts.

Especially on women.

Sometimes men have nice butts too.

Butts.

BOOKS.

I'm stuck in the smelly shanks of academia.
and I like it.

Currently reading (for enjoyment, somewhat):
Wind-Up Bird Chronicle
Autobio of Malcolm X

and practicing my Korean.

I'm pirating Rosetta Stone as I type this, in hopes that somehow, someway, I will pick up a new language. I wish I was a kid again. Kids have shown to be more receptive of new languages.

I should stop downloading. A very popular music torrent site, Oink, got shut down today. The man in charge of it got arrested. I was a member of that site. Yay.

I'm chopping my hair off this weekend. And on another note, I'm sick.

Fires a-plenty. Hope everyone is doing okay.

I'm still listening to IN RAINBOWS. Ridiculous.

Glendale

I'm spending the next few days at my cousin's house in Glendale. She asked me if I could housesit with my nephews while she goes to London with her hubby for a business trip.

It's family, so I didn't refuse.

It's not a bad situation anyway. I'll get to know my Jersey nephews a bit more (one is 18 and applying early for Stanford and the other is 15, just starting high school in California), eat a lot of take-out, and most importantly, enjoy the traffic jams in the morning as I drive from the 2 (Glendale) all the way to the 22 (Long Beach).

I just made some dinner for my nephews, did the dishes, cleaned the kitchen, and prepared some stuff for tomorrow mornin'.

Damn, I'm good.
ijoke.

I wonder how they think of me as an uncle. An uncle who is only 3 to 6 years older than them.

IN RAINBOWS.

I think I'm in love.

Some new music.

I'm wasting time and not studying for my exams. Here are some artists/albums I've been digging lately. If you want any of these joints, get in touch with me.

Sharon Jones & The Dap-Kings - 100 Days & 100 Nights (Soul)

Kenna - Make Sure They See My Face (Rock/Soul)

Median - Median's Relief (Hip Hop)

The Cool Kids (Hip Hop)

El-P - I'll Sleep When You're Dead (Hip Hop)

Clara Hill Folkwaves - Sideways (Folk/Electronica)


Not much else has been going on. Exams are driving me mental. Work is long and time consuming. I'm filing for graduation. Social life is _________(null).

I'm going to end up having behaviour problems after reading through all these Psychology articles. They seem to be making me more neurotic and paranoid.

I borrowed 3 books from the library but have not touched them yet, because I've been busy reading course material.

I have yet to get started on my new blog. Hopefully I can get to that this weekend. I need contributors. Those of you whose parents drink and like to talk about their past, hit me up. Actually, they don't even need to be avid drinkers. As long as they love talking about their past and their history, you can contribute.

Some good things: keeping current with world events, thinking in the bigger picture (even though from the looks of this blog entry, it doesn't seem like it), and being a bit more resourceful.

I want to go back to Amsterdam.
Who wants to run to the beaches of Thailand with me?

Soju Memoirs

www.sojumemoirs.blogspot.com

I have big ideas for this blog. Big ideas. I just need to get it up and running.

University.

3 things that I constantly think about these days: School, Girls, Alcohol.

3 things that I'm kind of in love with right now: School, Girls, Alcohol.

3 things that I partake in which is not good for my health: School, Girls, Alcohol.

3 things that I really don't NEED: School, Girls, Alcohol.

3 things that I need to avoid: School, Girls, Alcohol.

3 things that I want to take behind a middle school and get pregnant: School, Girls, Alcohol.

Irony

I'm an adult now.

What was the first thing I did as an adult?

Lose my wallet. At the CHEESECAKE FACTORY. The wallet that survived with me in all my european travels, disappearing at the hands of a huge, dim-light restaurant with overpriced gin.

I'm annoyed.

We drove back and there was no trace of it. NO TRACE.

It doesn't make sense. I had it at the restaurant, and we didn't go anywhere else after. My pockets, John's car, and the factory of Cheesecakes did not have it. WHERE COULD IT HAVE GONE?!

I'm not even drunk. If I was trashed out of my brain, then I would understand, but I'm sober as fuck.

AHHHH.

Apparently I'm not ready to be an adult yet. ahah.

Novel

I want to write a novel about myself.

Is that too egocentric? Ha.

I'm an interesting case study. There are layers and layers of Jason Chung that could be transcribed to a novel (which could end up on Oprah's book club!)

Seriously though.

Maybe I should write it.

I'll need an editor.

Girl

I want a girl.

But I don't want a girl.

Girls are bothersome.

But so soft. hahah.

Drive Slow Homie.

Doesn't one usually drive much more recklessly if they are in a car by themselves?

How come it seems like I'm the only one who drives like a blind granny with a prosthetic leg when I drive alone?

For example, as I was driving home up Beach Blvd tonight, I kept trying to find the lane with the slowest cars. It had to be perfect. The cars in front of me had to be slow and the cars behind me had to be slow. The equilibrium of the slow had to match. Sometimes this doesn't work out the way I want it to, and sometimes it works out exactly as I planned it. In order to create this perfect slow lane, you need teamwork, from all the drivers in that lane, even if you aren't directly communicating with them. Trust me. I would text them all with elaborate slow lane equilibrium plans if I could. Besides, drivers are mental at night, so you have to choose wisely. You don't want to end up in a lane where everyone is speeding at around 60mph. That is too much pressure for late night cruising. Ruins the purpose of cruising.

But when you find that perfect cruising lane?

It is fuckin' beautiful.

When you are slowly cruising in the middle of the night, alone in your car, listening to albums you bought at Amoeba the night before, its well sexy.

Slow is the new fast.

Right? Right?

I guess what I'm trying to say is...

it's okay to take it slow sometimes.

drive slow homie.

Wal-Rant.

I went to Wal-Mart with Nima today, and for the first time in a LONG TIME, I felt terribly depressed.

WM (Wal-Mart) depressed the fuck out of me. As soon as I walked in, a heavy sensation of GLOOM weighed me down. The world seemed like a mundane, suffocating place as I passed by the long line of obese children waiting to buy their double quarter pounder with cheese happy meals and into the Men's clothes section, where all the articles of clothing looked like they were meant for Cholos (elbows up, side to side). The WM employees didn't help the situation at all. This is going to sound mean, but I gotta say it, because this is what I felt. THEY WERE ALL DEPRESSING TO LOOK AT. Each employee I saw seemed like they could be the next serial killer to make it big on the local evening news, on some KTLA/KCAL9 shit. They would be the serial killers who get caught easily because they are heavy and can't run away from the cops. The lighting inside Wal-Mart just sucks any vitality out of the place. The aisles were beyond beige and fantastically dull, to the point where I could paint the Last Supper on them shits and no one would notice. The customers (most of whom were fat as a blimp) looked like they were about to hang themselves while shopping for an 8pack of Fruit of the Loom underwear. AND WHY IS IT SO BIG? AND SO FULL OF UNORGANIZED MERCHANDISE?! Fuuuuuucccckkk. Fuckin' depressin'. I felt like I was in a jail cell of consumerism, trapped till I buy something with my hard earned Andrew Jacksons. What killed me was that if you want to leave the place, you gotta go through a fuckin' checkpoint manned by some old white lady. If your receipt is irregular and/or you have other items, you can't even leave the fuckin' place until that shit is sorted out. If you manage to get out in time without slitting your wrists in the kid's section, leaving a pool of blood near the Parker Brother board games, you still feel depressed because of the fuckin' humongous WAL-MART sign that watches you as you leave the fort. That sign is fuckin' depressing too. It's huge, blocky, white, and says 'Even if you feel like shit while you're in here, you'll end up coming back because of our low low prices. Bitch.' AND WHAT IS UP WITH THAT BIG ASS SMILEY FACE?! That shit creeps me the fuck out. The only thing smiling inside a WM is that mascot. You know why it's smiling? Because it's fuckin' evil. That's why. It's the devil reincarnate, in a fuckin' yellow smiley face for fuckin' WM. Do you remember the way it bounces around in those WM commercials? If you can remember that, then you know what I'm talking about. I could go on and on, but I think the smiley face is watching over me as I type this, since I still have the essence of WM on my shirt.

So, the moral of today's story is....

DON'T EVER GO TO WAL-MART UNLESS YOU WANT TO FEEL LIKE SHIT.

I'm going to need years of therapy for today's WM visit. Years.

FUCK WALMART.

In The Mood

I'm (title) for some adventure, yet no one wants to trek with me. I'm ready to go. Who else is ready? Let's do this shit. Death Valley. Brazil. Munich. Tibet. Laos. Egypt. Amsterdam. Los Angeles. Quebec. Peru. Pyongyang. Queensland. Bristol. The world is waiting yo.

I'm not (title) for uni. My grades from studying abroad were crap, and I'm not motivated by anything academic right now. My courses start on Sept. 4th, and I haven't prepared anything.

I'm (title) to move away. I'm a man without a country. I hate too much. I hate people in general, I hate surfers, I hate hippies, I hate conservatives, I hate liberals, I hate geeks, I hate thugs, I hate males, I hate females. The hate never ends. But, there are a lot of things I love too. It's just that I seem to hate more and more and find myself loving less and less. Everything seems bothersome sometimes yo.

I'm keepin' myself busy though.

Let Me In

Singing like a madman while driving on Beach Blvd. with the windows down after midnight could be one of the best things ever created by God. or Darwin. or Toyota.

I got offered head by three white girls in front of an AMPM in Cypress. All I had to do was buy them booze and redbull for their beerpong party. I declined. They proceeded to verbally abuse me with distasteful words like 'asshole' and 'fucker'. Bitches.

Apparently I've been flirting with a customer at our video store. And she has been flirting back. This is news to me. I thought I was just servicing a customer (in a retail-minded way). I think my coworker reads too deep into things.

I'm addicted to peaches. Costco's white seedless grapes are much too big to be organic. One of 'em was so big that I put it in my mouth, rolled it around with my tongue and took it back out because I couldn't believe how big it was. That's what she said.

I would like a nice and upstanding woman with a firm booty. Okay. I'll be honest. I just want the booty. What can I say? I'm a pirate. It's all I seek. Laughter ensues.

Bourne Ultimatum. Two Words. Fan. Tastic.

I have an erection. A stiff, attentive, Napoleonic erection for driving. I spend mucho pesos on gasolina. Meet up with me. Let us drive-o.

Benny Sings

I'm feelin' crummy fam.
Got a double dose of frustration and a couple pounds of blubber to go with it.

Sick of Southern California.
Hate school.
Love being anti-social.
Want to get out.
Reiterate, Need to get out.
Could cut all connections.
Would cut all connections.

This is out-of-character for me. This isn't me being whiny. This is me being semi-serious.

Maybe I'm lacking sleep....

Nah.

Books.

I've been reading a lot of books lately.

It saddens me that all these used book stores are closing down in the OC area. Book Baron (on Magnolia and Ball) is having a 50%off sale, so I've been spending the last couple of days huddled in it's dusty aisles, reading chapters from novels with unique titles (those are the only ones that seem to catch my attention) and judging other customers by their book choices (How many biographies of the Beatles do you REALLY need?).

For the past couple of years, the books I seem to start never get finished. There are no endings to most of the stories I have delved into. Do I lose interest? Do I not want to know the ending? Maybe some comfort is found when my mind decides that reading halfway is the best relationship you can have with a paperback. This way, I don't know the ending, leaving me the option of creating my own celestial/scornful/romantic/abrupt finish, or creating a situation where I'll always end up telling myself 'I should finish that book...', just incase I END up craving a need for an END.

FUCK.

I'm having the most fucked up week.

Shit. Everything decides to fuck with me this week. EVERYTHING.

I'm not the one to be mad and angry at the world, but right now? Fuck the world.

Shit is going good one minute, and then life just decides to fuck around and fuck with me the next. Didn't even give me a warning or nothin.

Fuck it.

Excuse me while I get fucked a bit more.

FUCK.

100

100th post.

1 month with Jee.

I need to get my celebration on tonight.

(untitled)

I'm well bored, here in Cypress.

It's great to see friends, there's no doubt about that, but this Orange County environment is lacking sensory stimulation, AKA fuckin' boring.

I looked forward to coming back home and bumming around, but now I'm quite sick of it. I usually adjust well to change (in this case, from the UK to US), but this is taking a bit more time than I thought it would.

My days consist of reading, watching movies, watching TV shows, running errands, driving around my mother and sister, doing dishes, getting the mail, doing some situps, having food fed to me by a bulldozer and taking mundane walks around Cypress.

Now that I think about it, I did waste some time in Swansea too. I went out, but not often. I explored, but not often. I engaged myself, but not often. I guess I'm just a semi- to anti-social being at my core.

Talking to my parents now is....interesting. They are starting to open up to me a bit more, and I am opening up a bit more to them. It's a nice change, compared to what our relationship use to be. Hopefully this will continue on and develop into something more open. It's better late than never, right?

also..

Feelin' quite elated these days. OH YOU KNOW WHY.

August can't get here any sooner mate.

Jongphil vs. Jason

Enjoy.

Jongphil: I need to graduate quickly, get my PhD and find a good job.
Jason: FUCK THAT. Grab a fuckin' backpack and pillow and hit the road. You only got 1 life, so live it up moron. Don't spend that shit behind a desk.

Jongphil: I want a woman who is intelligent, humourous, and is capable of maintaining a healthy relationship.
Jason: WHERE DA HO'S AT SON?!?! YOU KNOW WHAT I NEED???? STRIPPPPPPPP. CLUBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB.

Jongphil: I need to start saving up money in order to prepare for what's to come. Money is important, and without money, life will be hard.
Jason: *drinks away his earnings*

Jongphil: I should be maintaining my health, striving towards a healthy physical frame and healthy mindstate.
Jason: *eats ice cream by the pint, laying down on his stomach, while toying with the risk involved in murder*

Jongphil: You really should start reading more and getting serious about your academic ventures.
Jason: I wonder if I can finish all 6 seasons of The Sopranos in 3 days...

Jongphil: 'Excuse me sir, but I believe that there is a problem with this bill that you've issued me.'
Jason: 'MOTHAFUCKA FIX THIS SHIT BEFORE I KNOCK YOU OUT IN FRONT OF ALL THESE PEOPLE.'

Jongphil: I have work in the morning, so I should lay out my clothes and set my alarm 3 hours before work, just to give myself some prep time.
Jason: 2 for 1 MOJITOS AT THE BAR!!! FUCK WORK!! LET'S GET CRUNK SON!!!

Jongphil: I should probably take a nap. I have a long night of work ahead of me.
Jason: Fuck a nap you dirty gook. Go get some pussy!

Jongphil: Your family is important. Without them, you wouldn't be where you are today. Love them. Cherish them.
Jason: Move. Change your number. Run. Do whatever you can.

Jongphil: I'll let them vent. Everyone needs to vent sometimes, and everyone needs someone there to listen.
Jason: You called me for this shit? GET A GRIP. STOP WASTIN' MY MOBILE MINUTES. AT LEAST HAVE THE DECENCY TO CALL AFTER 9PM, WHEN THE CALL WILL BE FREE AND WHEN I CAN IGNORE IT.

Jongphil: I try to have a wide, diverse musical range, and try to focus on positive music.
Jason: THONG TH- THONG THONG THONGGGGGGG.

Jongphil: Money doesn't rule the world. All I want are the simple things in life. I don't need a nice car and a nice house to justify myself as a man.
Jason: You poor bastard. Take out a couple of loans from different banks and buy yourself a Aston Martin and a house in the Hills!!! You ain't got shit if you can't flaunt shit!

Jongphil: I want to lead a honest, moral life, and be a good example for my future kids.
Jason: Send yo kids to daycare and go smoke some fuckin' weed. Yo woman don't need to know about that side bird you've been seeing either. And keep drinkin' those 40's.

Back home

Being back in the states is....odd.

I think the only time I experienced this much culture shock was the first time I went to Korea.

I'm adjusting quickly, as usual, but it's interesting to examine my home life now and my home life then. I haven't changed drastically, but I notice things here and there that I would have been blind towards before.

EVERYTHING IS SO BIG. Cars, roads, food portions, people, houses.

I can't eat like I use to. I got bloated off half a bowl of Soondubu. I got horribly full off a normal sized bowl of Pho. I eat a thing of bread and coffee for breakfast, and that makes me full. I'd rather walk than drive (but this will probably change soon). I can't even sleep in my own bed, comfortably. WEIRD.

but....Korean food is so good. hahahaha. Oh god. How I have missed thee.

London

I'm at an internet cafe in Leicester Square, bored out of my bloody mind.

For the past few days, I've literally walked around most of central London, thrice. I have nothing left to see, so I've just been lounging around in Hyde Park, reading and drinking alcohol. When I can't be bothered to read, I just sit in the tube for countless hours, pensive and disenchanted. I feel like I've lived here for a long time. I feel bad for my friend because all I want to do is sit around and drink pints at pubs instead of attending musicals (expensive) and going out to clubs (expensive). She, who is 25, claims that I am an old man, and that I should take advantage of my youth while I can. I tell her that I don't need to be out clubbing and hitting up the nightlife to feel young. Then she laughs while she shakes her head with slight annoyance, saying 'You'll regret it.'

Jee's visit was good. Tons of walking and tons of alcohol and tons of food (fish&chips) and tons of tons of tons. Sorry for wearing you out so much as soon as you got off the plane. I should have let you sleep instead of dragging you around until late. I just tried to be a good guide, that's all. I hope you are having a good time on the Suh family whirlwind Western Europe tour.

I'm gonna be seeing familiar faces in a few days. I know I didn't really want to leave earlier, but now, I've flip flopped like John Kerry. I want to go back home. Bah. This feeling will probably change again. Probably in a couple of hours. haha.

Alright, I have to sign off. The internet is quite pricey in central London.

Adieu mates.

I'm

Done.

4 more days in Swanesa.

11 more days in the UK.

I'll miss this place.

NinjaVampires

I'm on the pints. Again.

I found myself packing stuff in my luggage today. I don't know why, but I just started folding clothes and putting away things, as if I was leaving in a couple of days.

I booked my last couple of nights in London today, as well as my train ticket for London. It's an odd feeling. I'm leaving a place I've grown attached to. I'm leaving home.

Drinking pints with Matt and his mates. Hearing about Heather and her SWIGs adventures. Hitting the bong with Nick and talkin' trash on each other. Talking to Maddy about the most random things. Watching all 4 seasons unfold outside in one day. Ordering in Chinese food without having to pay tip. Constantly wondering about how bone skinny Welsh girls have massive woman-domes and how big obese Welsh women walk around in miniskirts while it snows. The overabundance of chips that are served in this country. The BOB. Beer. Beer. Beer. Beer.

I don't know why I'm making this post already, because I'm still here for 2 weeks. hahaha.

I'm gonna get FUCKED up before I leave.

FUCKED UP.

...I should probably start studying for my last 4 finals.

.....NAHHHHH. ahahah.

*chugggg the beersss*

C.O.L.O.U.R.S.

It worries me that the impending doom that is sure to come from my lack of revision for my final exams are not bothering me AT ALL.

3 weeks until I go back to the states.
2 weeks until London.

I should probably study hard until then.

I want to update with some of my thoughts, but my mind is blanking out right now.

Oh. I had to listen to the problems between the Taiwanese married couple in my house. Both of them talked to me about their issues and I had to offer both of them my input and advice, after probing their married life. They have this ongoing joke between them that they need my help because I'm the doctor of the house. They noticed that everyone talks to me about their problems randomly, so I must have some kind of essence that draws in people. Anyway. This was the first time I had to 'counsel' a married couple, and I learned that being a psychologist/marriage counsellor must be quite frustrating and dangerous. Frustrating because I wanted to say a lot of things to both of them, bluntly, but I had to hold back, because even though I thought some of the issues they had were trivial, I didn't want to think of my opinion as more important than theirs, because I had to empathize. It's their MARRIAGE. Also, it's dangerous because I realized that IT'S THEIR FUCKIN' MARRIAGE THAT THEY'RE TELLING ME ABOUT. What if I say something that they take into consideration, which fucks up their whole relationship steez (style)? Honestly, what do I know about marriage? I'm young, I'm not married and I'm not planning on marrying anytime soon. The only thing I could do was offer my sympathy and empathize with each of them, especially the husband, because that's what I'm good at. Whenever people need someone to listen, I happen to be there, so I end up listening and empathizing. I may not be good at it, but I try, even though I never ask for it.

So, yea. I can't disclose any personal info about their problems, but in my unprofessional opinion, I think they are fineeee. I do feel bad for Jet (husband) though, because Anita (wife) is quite __________.

In other news:
I tell people I got women figured out. Women test this, and then try to tell me I'm wrong. Then I point out another thing about women and they start to laugh, slowly walking away, knowing that I'm right. HA. iJoke. Sort of.

You ladies and your feelings.

Y'all are all beautiful though. Much love from me to you.

I'm Callinnnnn
Out toooo
Alllll myyy
Your myyyy
Ladiesss and I can'tttt
LET youuuu
be withhh
no oneee
but meee
babyyyy

Selfish

My choice of music when I'm ridiculously blazed from the Miss Mary Jane?

This was my tracklist, according to iTunes:

Otis Redding - (Sittin' On) The Dock Of The Bay
Otis Redding - I've Been Loving You Too Long
William Bell - I Forgot to Be Your Lover
Stevie Wonder - Superwoman (Where Were You When I Needed You)
Al Green - Tired of Being Alone
Bill Withers - Can We Pretend
Amy Winehouse - Love is a Losing Game
Elliott Smith - Between The Bars
Elliott Smith - Big Ballad of Nothing
Elliott Smith - Angeles
Wu-Tang Clan - Shame on a Nigga
Stevie Wonder - Golden Lady
Stevie Wonder - Too High
D'Angelo - Untitled (How Does It Feel)
Van Hunt - Down Here In Hell (With You)
Van Hunt - Character
Maxwell - Whenever Wherever Whatever
Bilal - White Turns to Gray
Pharcyde - She Said (Remix)
Slum Village - Selfish
Slum Village - Tainted
Slum Village - La La
Slum Village - The Look of Love

(Sittin' On) The Dock Of The Bay

Download:
Otis Redding - (Sittin' On) The Dock Of The Bay

Sittin' in the mornin' sun
I'll be sittin' when the evenin' come
Watching the ships roll in
And then I watch 'em roll away again, yeah

Sittin' on the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away
I'm just sitting on the dock of the bay
Wasting time

I left my home in Georgia
Headed for the 'Frisco bay
'Cause I had nothin to live for
And look like nothing's gonna come my way

So I'm just gonna sit on the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away
Ooo, I'm sittin' on the dock of the bay
Wastin' time

Look like nothing's gonna change
Everything still remains the same
I can't do what ten people tell me to do
So I guess I'll remain the same, yes

Sittin' here resting my bones
And this loneliness won't leave me alone
It's two thousand miles I roamed
Just to make this dock my home

Now, I'm just gonna sit at the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away
Oooo-wee, sittin' on the dock of the bay
Wastin' time


Beautiful & timeless song by Otis Redding.

This song happened to play on my iTunes shuffle while I was laying in bed this morning, not wanting to face the day. The first few seconds of the tune immediately caught my attention. I laid stiff in my bed, which so messy that my blanket was taking up arms defending itself from my dirty clothes, staring at the ceiling, and listening. Otis Redding slapped me in the face with the lyrics of this tune, because it perfectly describes how I've been feelin' for the past few weeks.


Thanks Mr. Redding.

(This song was written and recorded by Otis Redding, 3 days before his death in a plane crash in 1967.)

BEER.

I love it.

I think I'd be happy living with beer, internet, standup comedy and music.

and a lady.

Oh. and food. Clothes would be useful too. Maybe some money? Chocolate. Donuts. Salmon.

I just wanted to say that studying about sleeping and dreaming makes you sleepy and dreamy. No, wait. Sleepy and Dream..ing? Anyway. Reading psychology research articles about subjects sleeping and subjects dreaming can make ANYONE tired.

I'm surrounded by students who have no motivation for uni work. I'm fucked.

*finishes off 4th can of Carling*

On and On and On

Instead of hitting the books and studying diligently, I've been listening to a plethora of music, 247.

I'm just going to list some albums that I've recently fallen for, with brief 1 sentence reviews of why I love them so.

Wilco - Sky Blue Sky (2007)
American rock stylings with songs so well written you'd slap your mother.
Elliott Smith - New Moon (2Disc) (2007)
Unreleased material that would've fit perfectly in Either/Or, Elliott Smith and XO. The Nick Drake of our generation.
Arctic Monkeys - Favorite Worst Nightmare (2007)
Disco-Punk-influenced rock from Northern England with a maturity that wasn't seen in their debut. Reminds me of the UK nightlife.
Maroon 5 - It Won't Be Soon Before Long (2007)
Funk, Soul, Gospel and Rock influences + great pop sensibilities of Maroon 5 = an amazing album.
Blonde Redhead - 23 (2007)
I remember Kam telling me about this band but I never paid attention to his hipster ways. I was wrong to do that.
I'm From Barcelona - Let Me Introduce My Friends (2006)
Huge collective from Sweden (Broken Social Scene style) with their happy, european influenced indie rock.
Eric Roberson - Left (2007)
Soul music at its finest, with Roberson writing and performing songs that makes me want to go make a baby.
The Bird & The Bee - The Bird & The Bee (2006)
Electronica and Jazz influenced rock group from California, led by the great vocal stylings of the lead singer, Inara.
Super Chron Flight Brothers - Emergency Powers (2007)
Hip Hop that makes the average music listener go 'WHAT THE FUCK?!'.
Lifesavas - Gutterfly (2007)
Great, great Hip Hop album with so much personality that you'd want to slap yo mama. (I'm not that clever, I know.)
DJ Kawasaki - Beautiful Too (2006?)
Japan puts out some of the best music, and this album happens to be one of them. House music at its finest.
Phat Kat - Carte Blanche (2007)
Straight up Hip Hop from the Dirty District, aka Detroit.
The Souljazz Orchestra - Freedom No Go Die (2007)
This group from Ottawa makes music that Fela would be proud of. Yay for white boys with soul.
Peter Bjorn and John - Writer's Block (2006)
Sweden seems to birth the best happy-go-lucky rock music ever. I should move there. This album is like whoa. Trust me.
Alex Wilson - Inglaterra (2007)
Latin and Salsa vibes from the UK pianist, doing big things with little recognition.
Ben Westbeech - Welcome To The Best Years of Your Life (2007)
This classically trained musician (cello/violin/piano) from the UK branches out into electronica and soul, creating one of the best albums this year. Thanks Gilles Peterson.
Beverly Knight - Music City Soul (2007)
Mmmm MMMMM. This beautiful woman makes beautiful music that could lead to beautiful things, if you know what I mean.

I have all these available, if anyone is interested. Just hit me up or leave me a comment and I shall provide.

There's a lot of quality music out there. Music hasn't died yet mates.

Dear Mama

Much love to my madre.

I wrote this long entry sharing a memory about my mother, but blogger decided to fuck around on me and delete it.

Appreciate the mothers y'all.

I'm So On Your Mind

...more like, I'm So Buzzed.

I had a whole bottle of white wine from OL' GAY FRANCE. SEMILLION SAUVIGNON FROm BORDEAUX TO BE EXACT.

I am also listening to some house music mixed by my homie PABLO. GOOOOOOD STUFF.

At first, the wine had no effect one me. None. Nada. Zilch. Zip. Zippo. Lighter.

But after about 10 minutes (after finishing the bottle), WOOO. Attack of the buzzcocks.

Flippy Floopydy FOOOOO.

I'm crazay.

I can't believe I'm going home in a month. It is quite scary.

I will miss Swansea a lot.

Comedy

Louis C.K.

Patton Oswalt

Two great standup comedy albums. I've been laughing my ass off ALL DAY. ALL FUCKIN' DAY.

STUDYIN?! FUCK THAT. COMEDY BABY. CO-ME-DY.

Endorphins galore.

Housewife.

Anita (my new, married housemate from Taiwan) and I were shootin' the shit in the kitchen while we were cooking. She was cooking for her hubby, Jet, while I was cooking for myself. We were talking about how life is so simple for us here, because all we do is cook and sit around watching shows on tv-links. Our discussion turned into talks about our mothers and housework, and we both agreed that being a housewife is hard work, because the only thing that stays on your mind is cooking. We also agreed that housewives must have a hard time figuring out what to do when they aren't cooking. Basically, the conclusion we reached is that our mothers had it hard, being a housewife is not very stimulating and we were both housewives. (Actually, she claimed that I was much more of a housewife than her, because I didn't have a spouse to help me wash the dishes. *tear*). I thought about this a lot. What does a housewife think about? How do they kill all that time?

I think the following paragraph I wrote is a good summary of the mentality of an average housewife.

When you wake up, you think about what you want to make for breakfast. While you're eating breakfast, you give some thought about what to eat for lunch. While you're eating lunch, you ponder about what to eat for dinner. While you're eating diinner, you gaze off and wonder what you will prepare for breakfast the following day. If you don't have any food, you wonder about the things you need to buy. While you're using ingredients, you think about what other ingredients you will need for the next meal. While you're cooking, you realize that you need to buy more ingredients. While you're buying the ingredients you thought you needed, you start to think about something else you would need to supplement these ingredients. After you finish cooking, eating and wondering about ingredients, you try to kill some time by watching tv or doing some at-home exercises. While you're watching tv, you start think about the dirty dishes that are sitting in your sink. You go to wash the dishes and start think about getting the mail. When you get the mail, you start to wonder about the dust all over the house. While you are wiping down every damn thing in the house, you realize that the floor must be disgusting. You start to mop the floor, but then you notice some food particles in the carpet, so you whip out the hoover and go at it. After all this is done, you sit down, wiping the sweat from your forehead, and think about something you can eat for a snack. While you eat the delicious snack, you think about what to eat for dinner.

IT NEVER ENDS.

Basically, being a housewife is hard. It ain't no joke.



and I'm a great housewife.

HOLLA.

SCOT-ish.

Here is a mini recap of my Scotland trip. Enjoy.


Day 1



Tamara and I arrived at the hostel first, waiting for Triet. We explored the hostel and realized that there was a fuckin' sea/bay behind the hostel, so we went for a walk. The weather was amazing. (I also spotted a very small and stumpy Scottish lady who made me laugh out loud). After the waterside walk, we met up with Triet and decided to catch the shuttle to the city centre of Edinburgh. Edinburgh has a lot of random tours and we wanted to take one of the many 'Ghost' tours. These Ghost tours are supposedly really well done. However, we couldn't find the tourguides and didn't want to settle for some other lame tour. We ended up walking around the city late at night, trying to find a place to hang out. We walked around and found this pub called Dirty Dicks. I think we went inside because the name was funny, but the pub turned out to be really nice. The inside had amazing decorations and the atmosphere was very chill. We were the youngest in there and definitely stood out, but we didn't care. I had some scottish beer and scottish whiskey (Jura). After chillin' at Dirty Dick's for a bit, we decided it was late and we should start heading back. Originally, the late night bus was going to be our transporation back home, but the bus wasn't going to be coming for another hour, so we desperately hailed over a taxi and paid a buttload to go back to the hostel.

Day 2



Woke up late. Ate some breakfast. Missed our shuttle, so we killed some time by playing pool and playing the UK version of 'Who Wants to be a Millionaire?'. We lost horribly. Then we spent the rest of the day in the Citay. Edinburgh castle was the main attraction. The entrance fee was 11quid (pounds), which drained my wallet dramatically, since I'm broke as a joke. However, we had fun exploring the castle. We humped the cannons, shouted crazy things, took a lot of pictures and made up a lot of inside jokes. After the castle, we hit a tour of the underground vaults of Edinburgh. I really enjoyed this tour because it taught me a brief history of Edinburgh back in the day while showing us a what the vaults were used for. I wish I could type out everything, but it's too much. Basically, the vaults were used for workers (goldsmiths, blacksmiths, etc), wine cellars, oyster bars, society meetings and even a whiskey distillery. Amazing. By the time this was over, it was already 6pm, so we decided to go back to the hostel early and have some food from the hostel bar. I ate some scampi, drank a couple of pints and talked it up a Canadian bloke from Vancouver who wants to go into television production. The Canadian kid (Jared) told us that he hadn't been to the beach yet, so we decided to hit up the place at around midnight. The tide was far out and the beach was quite beautiful at night. However, when we were walking back, we all managed to step into mounds of mud. All of our shoes were ruined, especially mine. So i stayed up for another hour or so cleaning my shoes and washing my socks. I wasn't angry or anything though, cause I'm just chill like that. Took a nice long shower, played more 'Who Wants to be a Millionaire?', and went to sleep.

Day 3



We paid 33quid to go on a day long coach tour of Glen Coe, Loch Ness, Inverness, The Scottish Highlands and other random Scottish towns in the boonies. I usually hate coach tours because my ass hurts from sitting all the fuckin' time, but this was one alright. I told myself that I wasn't going to fall asleep on the bus because I wanted to take in as much of Scotland as I could, and I DID manage to stay awake. While most people in the coach were sleeping, I enjoyed the scenary and listened to the audio tour very closely. Glen Coe was beautiful. The weather was good, not great, but the driver said that the weather was really good this time around. There was a lot of fog around the highlands, but that was to be expected. Loch Ness was nothing much. It was just a giant lake. However, the castle ruins of Urquahut castle next to Loch Ness were quite cool. We also drove through/stopped at a lot of random Scottish towns, which had their own unique part in Scottish history. It was interesting to learn about all the insane bloodshed that happened in Scotland. Those crazy mothafuckas would go on massacres and fights for the monarch and for honor ALL THE TIME. The coach tour started around 8am and ended at 8pm. We were tired as shit and hungry as fuck. Triet and I were willing to dish out 11quid to eat Chines buffet, but Tamara didn't want that, so we ended up hittin' an Italain place. The food was decent, but the waiters were annoying. Actually, they were nice at first, but they expected me to pay a tip at the end because I was American. FUCK OUTTA HEA. They kept dropping subtle hints about tip, but I couldn't help them out because I'm broke as fuck. After dinner, we bummed around a bit more and then went back to the hostel. Triet and I wanted to play some pool, but we got huslted by two charming Aussies. Damn those charmers. Conned us into a game of doubles and DESTROYED us. We were sad. We showered and went to sleep, because tomorrow was a long day of travelling back home. PS: FUCK AUSSIES. THE HOSTEL WAS OVERRUN WITH THEM. ALL HOSTELS ARE. STOP TRAVELLING AUSSIES!! STOP! STOP HUSTLING US. ahaha.

Anyway..

That was my trip to Scotland. I'm sorry if it's hard to follow. I'm quite exhausted right now, from laying around all day and doing nothing. Besides, it's a well known fact that I have terrible grammer and sentence structure.

Spiderman 3

I will be discussing the movie. If you haven't seen it, do not proceed.

*SPOILERS*



















Pros:
- James Franco (Harry) was the best character. He played it really well. Example: The Cafe scene with Peter.
- Dark Peter vs. Harry was an amazing action scene. Quite intense.
- Peter smacked Mary Jane.
- Venom looked crazy.
- Sandman was well done.
Cons:
- I hate Kirsten Dunst. I wanted her to die in every way possible. Those damn trucks kept missing their target.
- Aunt May needs to shut it. Fo' real.
- All that dancing and singing was not needed. Some humor is good, but that was too much.
- VENOM IS SUCH A CRUCIAL CHARACTER AND YET HE DIES IN 20 MINUTES?!
- How does Harry survive a bomb blast yet Eddie and the symbiote get annihilated?
- After Spidey saved Gwen, the scene just ends. WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKIN' CRANE THATS SPINNING OUT OF CONTROL MATE?
- too much crying
- too much crying x2.
- too much singing an dancing. It was funny the first time, but they overdid it with the jazz club scene. Looks like they watched 'Anchorman' and got inspired.
- random butler
- The Emo Peter.
- Peter did not get his saixtime with Gwen or Betty from the Bugle.
- Letting a criminal go at the end of the movie.
- More crying at the end
- 'We all have choices.' Fuck outta hea. Y'all could have picked a better moral to end it with.

My rating? 2.5/5

I need to go watch Spiderman 2 again, just to try and forget about this one.

Glen Coe Song

Got back from Scotland today.

The trip with Tamara and Triet was well fun.

Pictures are up on facebook. I'll edit this entry tomorrow and go into more details.

As for right now, I must sleep. I am quite exhausted.

Wanderlust

May 1st, 2007.

ALREADY?!? Where has the time gone?

Today, I managed to crank out two essays in the span of 9 hours. I'm proud, but disgustingly exhausted. I still have one more left that I must finish tonight.

I am going to Edinburgh tomorrow with Tamara, a California girl. I think I'll be too tired to enjoy myself, but we'll see. I'll take nice pictures and visit Nessy for y'all.

Hopefully I'll be able to get my buzz/crewcut tomorrow. I think I'm going to end up looking like an overweight Korean American wankster. I've thought a lot about it, and came to the conclusion that I'd rather look like a wankster if it means that I don't have to wear my beanie around all the time. Why wear your beanie all the time, you ask? Well, if you saw my hair, you would understand. I look like a caveman from the 80's. In a way, it's fitting of me, because I live in a hole and go hunt for food on occasion. I also listen to a lot of Prince. Hmmm.

PS: I'm listening to Bjork's new album. She sounds like a dying goose. That is all.

Things Done Changed

I miss 90's hip-hop.

I still love today's climate of music, but when I listen to these albums from the 90's, I get nostalgic.

I wish I was my current age back in the 90's, just so I could be more appreciative of all the classics that 90's hip-hop gave us.

Sit back, light up a joint and spin 'Midnight Marauders' from beginning to the end.

That's what I want right now.

I don't want to deal with any of this bullshit.

I just want...that.

Earth Intruders

Essays are the death of me.

I am not motivated AT ALL. This is really bad.

It's Thursday, 5:18AM, and I am nowhere near finishing any of these essays.

Instead, I'd rather watch 'Martin' and roll around in my bed with a book across my stomach.

Doctor Who?

DOCTOR GU!!!!!!

Congrats Wendy Gu.

I mean...

Congrats Dr. Wendy Gu!

You know what this means right?

FREE PHYSICALS FOR EVERYBODY!!!! AHHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

iJokes.

SLEEP WALKER.

You'd think that learning about the effects of sleep deprivation over and over again would make an individual more aware about his sleeping habits.

HA.

Yesterday night, due to Helen Kim's nagging (ijoke), I managed to come across my old xanga from 2002-2003. Quite a blast from the past, if I say so myself. Reading through old entries about your life during your adolescent years makes you feel ancient. While I only updated that xanga once or twice a month, it was interesting to read the shit I would whine about. Here are some funny things that I said on that xanga, paraphrased:

- Speech is fun.
- My friends are falling apart.
- I dislike my father.
- SAT classes were horrible.
- I hated being called 'fat' while I was in Korea.
- I LOVE 50 Cent.
- I have a lot of 'internet' friends from the forum I use to post at.
- I am probably depressed.
- My parents party more than I do. (This has not changed. Hahaha)

Yea. I tried to find my other xanga from 2000-2002, but I can't remember the fuckin user name. All I know is that those entries will be depressing as shit because I was going through my awkward, fat, lonely, Lineage-playing, new to California phase.

I'm glad that I can look back at these things and laugh it off. However, it's a bit creepy as well, because I remembered all my angsty emotions as I was writing those entries. It's hard to believe that I was that angsty back then. I don't think I've changed DRASTICALLY since my younger days, but I've definitely grown. If you read those entries, they all give off the 'Jason Chung and his bad grammer' vibe that you get when you're reading the entries on this blog.

(I've accepted the fact that I don't remember anything about proper sentence structure and grammer.)

I even went through the old entries on this blog and found myself feeling ancient. I think I'm mostly shocked by how fast a year has gone by.

Anyway. If y'all got old blogs and shit like that, take some time to browse the old text that you wrote back in 2003, 2002, or 2004. Trust me. It's fun. Or horrifying. Or...sexy.

PS: I have officially changed my flight to the 21st of June. My flight arrives at LAX at 18:35. Yay.

Que Sera Sera

I might be coming home on the 21st of June.

My parents want me to come home early because they want to me attend one of those dull family weddings. You know the ones I'm talking about. They are the distant cousins that you've never met or heard of until the wedding was announced. You have no clue what they look like, no clue who they are and no clue as to how they are intertwined in your family lineage.

I can already guess that the wedding will be at a church of some sort, so I'll have to sit through a dry sermon about God and his amazing and undying love for the couple getting married. On top of that, the choir will start singing Christian hymms in Korean that everyone happens to know the lyrics to, except me.

The food will taste like typical catered Korean food. Cold 갈비 (kalbi), tasteless 김치 (kimchi), salty 미역국 (seaweed soup), watery 만두 (dumplings) and rock hard 떡 (rice cakes).

If I end up getting hitched, I will make my wife plan a bomb ass wedding. None of this churchy, Asian crap. No offense to the church lovers and Asian embracers, but I want a wedding somewhere out in the open with an open bar and a massive massive buffet table full of dead animals. RAW DEAD ANIMALS. We can feast like a pride of lions. IT WILL BE GLORIOUS!! LEAVE NONE FOR THE VULTURES I SAY!!

That was a joke.

I think my dad told me the wedding will take place in Santa Barbara. And I think he said it wasn't at a church.

I know. I made you think it was at a church. Sucka. I just wanted an excuse to rant about weddings.

Actually, I don't think my dad told me anything about the wedding, except that it's going to be near Santa Barbara. I probably made up the whole 'not at a church' thing in my head.

If this wedding ends up being at a church....hahaha. The jokes on me.

Days and Nights...

...passed as I sat in front of this macbook screen, typing a long entry about my thoughts on a few subjects. However, blogspot decided to be a 'nappy headed ho' and deleted my entry.

I'm too aggrivated to type it all out again, so I will be brief and concise.

1) Don Imus, Hip-Hop & Oprah.

Don Imus called a female basketball team "nappy headed hos" and then goes on to say that black rappers say it all the time and they don't get a penality. Get the fuck outta hea IMUS. Imus deserved to be fired. That's like white people saying 'Black people use the word 'nigga' all the time, why can't I?!' So of course, in predictable fashion, the white media decides to shift the whole focus onto hip-hop culture and its horrible effects on society and mainstream culture. What do I say to that?

STOP BLAMING HIP-HOP AND STOP BLAMING RAPPERS. Y'ALL KNOW YOU'RE USING HIP-HOP AS A SCAPEGOAT. Misogyny didn't pop up when hip-hop was born! Misogyny has been deep rooted in this country's history since those ships escaped from the British. Don't get me wrong. I acknowledge that there is a problem in the hip-hop community, but you know what? It is not the fault of rappers. The problem is with the music industry. They are the ones that promote these songs degrading women.

What's the solution? Bring balance to the airwaves. Play the shit that makes money, but make sure you play the shit that sends a message. Trust me. There is so much hip-hop out there that y'all don't know about, yet y'all are quick to judge on shit you don't know. I like the songs about bitches and hos and I like the songs sending positive messages. There is a market for both! Get to know this OPRAH.

Oprah's two part 'town hall' meeting was such bullshit. Nothing got resolved, she had the hip-hop panel cornered and everyone in that show didn't listen to the one sensible man who pointed out the real problem (shout outs to you, Mr. Entertainment Lawyer). If you wanted a real panel, you invite Snoop, Ice Cube, Ludacris, Lyor Cohen, Jimmy Iovine and the VP of BET! You don't call in Russell Simmons and Common! Your critics on your stance were Ice Cube and Luda, not Common and Russell. Come on Oprah. Stop worrying about the soccer moms who desperately want to 'understand' this and try to actually create an environment for intelligent discourse and discussion on the show. I love what Oprah has done for the world, but come on. COME ON.

*edit* If you don't want your kids listening to these songs and watching these videos, be the parent and stop them from doing that. It is ultimately your responsibility as a parent to teach him about the world as best as you can. If your kids are developing an understanding of women through rap, then you fucked up.


2) Cho.

Why are Koreans apologizing on his behalf? Okay. I can understand that you don't want a bad public image, but what do you have to be embarrased about? Does Cho define who you are as a Korean American? No, he doesn't. Stop making this about Cho and make it about the victims of this tragic event. Cho made a stupid decision that affected many lives. Don't be selfish by making this about the embarrasment of the community.

Another thing. THE WHITE MEDIA DOES IT AGAIN. They take everything and spin it out of control. NYTIMES saying that Cho could have been influenced by violent South Korean movies like 'Oldboy'. Jack Thompson saying some bullshit about Cho playing violent games like Counter-Strike which trained him through hypervirtualreality. GET THE FUCK OUTTA HEA! What happened to being CRAZY? If y'all saw those videos that NBC had up for a good couple of hours, you can obviously tell that the kid missed a few hugs growing up. Counter-Strike, Oldboy and (it better not come to this) music had nothing to do with Cho.

Another thing part2. He's been in the states since 8. Accept it. He sounds like Napoleon Dynamite for God sakes. Stop saying 'Cho Seung Hui from South Korea.' Also, whats with putting the last name first? It's Seung Hui Cho, Korean American male.

If anything, the lesson we learn from this event is that crazy people come from all backgrounds, and we have to work together in recognizing the signs.

Also, these types of mass murders happen 3 times a day in Iraq. Register that.

3) On A Brighter Note...

-I think I have a hemorrhoid.

ijoke.....*cough*

-Let's see. Don Imus is happy that the news is off his ass.
-I will soon be rolling in the pound sterlings. It will be painful, but the rolling will commence nonetheless.
-I hate academia. I feel like I wasn't meant for this.
-I WANT TO BE IN LONDON. OR AMSTERDAM. OR PARIS. SOMEWHERE.
-I'm nervous about going back home. It will be quite awkward.
-I'm going to reinvent myself in the next 2-3 years. WATCH OUT WORLD!
-I think they should give me a radio show.
-I hate the American news programs. I do. Donald knows what I'm talking about.
-I'm never gonna get any work done.
-THE WEATHER IS SO NICE!

Nature Sounds.

It has begun again.

I am now addicted to nature shows. I started watching this British nature show called 'Planet Earth'. WOW. AMAZING. The cinematography of the show is quite astounding. Shows like this remind me of how beautiful this giant rock really is. Trust me on this one.

http://tv-links.co.uk/show.do/1/912

1. Copy and paste that link into your browswer

2. Enjoy. Learn. Live.

On a more serious note, I feel like I have to address something about Don Imus, this attack on Hip-Hop, Cho the VT shooter and Asian American stereotypes. I might make my next entry on those subjects. I might.

Anyway. Back to 'Planet Earth'.

You Know You're Korean When...

I miss my Korean-ness. I've decided to post some random things about Koreans, entitled 'You Know You're Korean When...'

Feel free to add on. This entry took some brainpower, but it was fun to type up. Enjoy.

- you think anything soup or stew thats spicy and hot is the best cure for a hangover.
- you're convinced that South Korea won the World Cup in 2002.
- you remember to bring the jar of kimchi to the camping trip but forget the sleeping bags.
- you wake up in the morning and have soju for breakfast.
- you think that leaving a fan on throughtout the night while having the windows closed will kill you.
- you disregard pedestrians
- you get deeply emotional from a Korean drama, even though the story line makes no sense at all.
- you think picking your nose in public (while your hand is covering your nose) is fine.
- you think that Seo Taiji is analogous with Michael Jackson.
- you smell someone's juicy fart and your mouth starts to water.
- you genuinely believe that kimchi can cure anything.
- you eat certain foods because they will increase your sexual stamina from 3 thrust finishes to 4 thrust finishes.
- you open up a business and close it down 2 years later because there are 12 other businesses in your block with the same exact services.
- you deny that Koreans eat dog, even though you yourself have eaten dog on many occasions (and enjoyed it).
- you think eating eel will give you a hard-on, but eating bean sprouts will make you lose it, and the reasoning behind both is: "the shape".
- you take pictures of everything you see while you're on vacation. A picture of you in front of a shop, of you in front of a house, of you in front of a bush, etc.
- you think Koreans are superior because we are descendents of a bear that ate garlic. (look this up)
- you are convinced that this new super medicine pill will help you look younger, lose weight and help your sex drive.
- you stick a needle in your thumb to relieve indigestion.
- every friend you made in any grade level is still your friend and you meet them at least once a year, especially the ones that you sat next to in your classes.
- you ask questions like 'Are you sure you can handle it?' while you warn people how about spicy Korean food is, even when they are almost done with their bowl of kimchijjigae.
- you're convinced that everyone in the world knows that Nong-Shim makes some of the best ramyun.
- you have 20 pictures on your highly advanced camera phone, and it's all pictures of you.
- you think Hyundai makes classy, affordable cars.

and finally,

- you find yourself hating the Japanese.

My Mother's Hymm Book

I'm convinced.

If Al Green was my church Reverend and Johnny Cash was the praise leader who sang all the hymms, I would go to church every damn day. I would gladly empty my pockets for the building fund, missionary fund, food drive fund, the pastor needs new shoes fund, the fund for funds or whatever other fund that the church was collecting money for. I just imagine Al Green singing the words of the Lord during his whole service. Actually, I wish that James Brown (RIP) was also a Reverend at this church, so he could make any word of the Lord impactful after every 2 or three sentences by saying 'HA!'. (For those of you who listen to James Brown and know what I'm talking about, kudos to you).

So.

I know I don't have a massive following on this blog, but I'm bored, so I shall propose a novel idea. Well, it's not novel, nor is it about a novel, and really, it wasn't even my idea, but shutup and participate anyway. Sorry, you don't have to shutup. I was just being demeaning. (sidenote on the word 'Demeaning'. Shouldn't that word mean 'to un-mean'? I don't understand why that word means degrading. The mysteries of the English language. Sounds like a PBS Documentary).

Ask me questions. Curious about anything? My stance on affirmative action? The way I dress in the morning? What my favorite smell is? Come on. Get to know me. I'm fun. I think.

Give me entry ideas. I know it's weird, but I'm addicted to blogs and blogging. I have a million things I want to blog about, but when the time comes, I forget them ALL. ALL. I don't want to look like a loser and write down these ideas and save them for later. That's just lame. Besides, I think I'm a comment whore. I like to check my Gmail, especially when it tells me that I have a new comment on this blog or on facebook or something. WHY LORD WHY?! WHY MAKE ME A COMMENT WHORE?!?!

Yeah, so...If there are any readers who don't comment but read this mess, please, give me something to blog about.

Until next time,

Jongphil.

Day Old Blues

I must be going through a mid-life crisis. I FEEL like I'm going through one. Does this mean I'll die when I'm 42?

Lately, I've been having these immense urges to reconnect and discover my roots. I want to learn about my Korean roots, and weirdly enough, my Southern roots.

The idea of wanting to discover my Korean roots is understandable. I'm Korean after all, and I've been void of Korean culture for quite some time. Don't get me wrong, I know some of my shit. I can understand subtle undertones about Korean society in Korean movies because I've experienced it off and on during my childhood. However, I can't seem to understand why I feel like I need to go back to the South and discover my Southernness. I haven't thought too much about the South since I left the place in '99, but the more I think about it, the more I realize that the South played a massive part in making me the person I am today, good and bad. I have experienced a lot of shit living in California during my growin' years, but the South has left a lasting impression. I know. It's probably because I think fondly of my odd childhood. It's probably because thats where I grew up. It's probably because a lot of stuff happened there that still affect me and all that shit.

All I know is, I need to go back. I want to visit Charleston. I want to visit Goose Creek. I want to drive around Dorchester County. I want to go to Columbia. I want to enjoy the 5 hour drive from Charleston to Atlanta. I want to visit the strip mall where my parents opened their first beauty supply store. I want to track down old friends and maybe make new ones. I want to go to Ryan's Buffet one more time, even though I can't eat 2/3 of the shit they serve (because theres so much meat). I want to see if the Korean church that I wrecked havoc in is still there. I want to know if the PK's (Pastor's Kids) ended up being fucked up teens, because they sure were when I was hangin' with them. I want good ol' Church's chicken from the place right across our store. I want to see if Ann is still runnin' a salon. I want to see Shanene and her mom. I want to see the Haiwaiian girl and her family that let me crash their place from time to time while my parents worked after school (I'm pissed that I forgot her name. I think I had a crush on her too. Shoot.) I want to get in touch with Wakeem, probably my best friend from back in the day. I want to see what Soonam has been up to, and knowing him, hes probably a golf champion in his league or a major nerd. I want to see Sang and Tae hyung (hyung = brother in Korean) and see if they are still 'thuggin' it out. I want to see Natasha again (apparently shes an aspiring singer now) and eat at her mom's restaurant. I want to see Travis (even though I heard he's kind of insane. Really.) and talk about our top ten Pokemon fansite we ran. I want to see if those playboys are still in our woodland fort. I could go on and on yo.

That sure is a lot of wants.

I hope to reconnect with the South sometime before I die (42?).

but damn, I wish I retained some of my light southern accent. Imagine how much of a pimp I would be.

Sunday Morning

I cleaned the whole house today.

It took me a good 6 hours. The Saudi housemates left unexpectedly at 3am yesterday, for their new uni at Brighton, so I got stuck with all the mess they made in our kitchen.

The kitchen was so nasty. SO NASTY.

Dirty plates, unfinished food, cigarette butts, meat grease, burnt veggies, sour milk, rotten mayo, leftover burgers, pans with grease burnt on to it, unwashed pots, pistachio shells, orange skins, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Did I mention ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! ?

At least the mothafucka is clean now. I can finally cook in the kitchen without having to look around for giant rats or killer tomatoes.

I wish I knew Captain Planet, so he could come, and in one swift and sweet breath, magically make my kitchen spotless and have the dishes cleaned and organized neatly in the cupboards.

EARTH FIRE WIND WATER HEART, BY YOUR POWERS COMBINED, I AM CAPTAIN PLANET! BE PREPARED DIRTY KITCHEN! I SHALL ATTACK WITH MY MIGHTY AND SWIFT BREATHE OF CLEANING, SPONSORED BY FEBREEZE!

Okay. Sorry. That was very lame. There's no excuse for what I just typed.

Yes. I've been watching cartoons. I am also reading comics again. People actually take the time to scan each issue and put them up on torrent sites for download! YES. hahah. Now comics are added to my list of addictions as well as the list of reasons why I have no life and why I'm single.

I Gotta Say What UP!!!

I want to master the Korean language.

I will do this. I will.

I realized that I need to learn more Korean to better understand Korean culture. I want to read history, folklore, proverbs, stories and all that good shit, IN KOREAN. Not no translated/subtitled shit. AND I want to UNDERSTAND it, in Korean.

Shoot.

Time to download the Rosetta Stone Korean Learning package. ahahah.

I could support my Korean people by hiring a Korean tutor, but nahhhh. I'm cheap. ahahah.

Strange Bath

Absolutely nothing going on in my life.

Besides music.

I've been listening to a lot of music lately. While I sit on my bed, staring expressionlessly at the cream slash rotten eggnog colored wall, my ear cells constantly swivel around like tornados to absorb the music blasting from my housemate's overly powerful speakers (of which I temporarily rented).

A list of some vibrations that have sent me traveling without moving:

D'Angelo - Voodoo (This album is getting so much action from me.)
Al Green - Let's Stay Together
Jon Brion - Meaningless
Antibalas - Security
Final Fantasy - He Poos Clouds
Joanna Newsom - Ys
Fishbone - The Reality of My Surroundings
Fu-Schnickens - F.U. Don't Take It Personal
Elton John - Goodbye Yellow Brick Road
The Jackson 5 - ABC
2pac - Me Against The World
J Dilla - Donuts

and...the new Maroon 5 single. That's right. THAT'S RIGHT. Maroon 5.

sigh.

Love Hater

Conversations with many have lead me to this conclusion:

We all need some good lovin'.

Let us not be Love Haters.

(This post was brought to you by a day of watching romantic comedies while drinking hot chocolate.)

Bored.

I AM BORED OUT OF MY FUCKIN' MIND.

SWANSEA IS DEAD.

AIN'T NO FRIENDS AROUND.

AIN'T NO FOOD IN MY FRIDGE.


AHHHHHHHH.

Someone cook for me. *tear*

Mommy, What's a Funkadelic?

I've already used up a week of my spring break doing absolutely nothing productive.

Movies, movies, movies and alcohol.

Shieeeet.

Tomorrow, I will get my shit together. I'll get my study on, my eatin' on and my normal sleep schedule on.

I just realized, today is the worst day to be planning my productiveness. You know what day it is right?

April Fools Day.

bwahaha.

I'mma drink this wine and go to sleep. I'll provide more insightful entries soon. I just like blabbin' about my daily routines right now.

Jonz in my Bonz

4:30pm.

My house is empty.

The village is quiet.

Sin juice flowing in my veins.

Harmonziing to D'angelo.

I'm drunk off my knickers.

ahah.

Ignore this post.

If you can.

FUCK.

Fuck people. This is why it's so fucking hard to trust anyone and trust the people around you. I stay positive and shit, but sometimes humanity is just too fucking complicated.

I have to keep my room locked 247 now.

I guess I'm naive after all.

I haven't learned shit.

"Everything that happened to you could have been prevented." - the Angered Padre. (in reference to the mugging, the camera jacking, the debit card loss, and now, the credit card theft.)

I think its unreasonable to think that way, but I hate it when my dad is right. hahah.

Fuck people. Fuck em.

Ain't shit that's right in this world ladies and gentlemen.

Shit ain't right.

Rewind.

Spring break + sickness = movie time!

My activities this week:

Movies by Kevin Smith
-Jersey Girl: I love this movie. It's a shame that people don't really dig it like I do, but alas, it's quite good and touching.
-Mallrats: Classic. Long monologues and kryptonite condoms.
-Clerks: Reminds me of working behind a counter. Another classic.
-Chasing Amy: Great GREAT GREAT movie. Check it out if you haven't.
-Jay & Silent Bob Strikes Back: bwahaha. NOOCH.
-Dogma: My favorite religious movie. haha.
-An Evening with Kevin Smith: This made me want to go on this Kevin Smith binge. He's fucking hilarious.
-An Evening with Kevin Smith 2, Evening Harder: Funny as shit. Kevin Smith is a god amongst men.

Random Movies
-Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: eh. It's worth downloading, but I would have never paid to watch this. Also, Zhang Ziyi is horrible. Example: "Yu r so lich n pawafur. We hab onher. My poot sordier ej belly pawafur."
-Ghostrider: I liked it. It wasn't fantastic, but it was a pretty good movie adaptation of the comic and hero.
-The Breakfast Club: It's been a while since I watched this flick. I love it. It's making me want to go on a John Hughes binge.
-Star Wars 2 Phantom Menace: The best out of the recent 3, but still pretty fucking bad.
-Pursuit of Happyness: Love it.
-Night at the Museum: It was okay. Kinda cheesy. Kinda good. Kinda interestin.
-Casino Royale: This movie made me forget the terrible Bond movies within the past few years.
-Friday After Next: Not as good as the OG hood classic, Friday, but still fun.


Yep.

I'm quite pathetic.

Someone entertain me.

Itchyhead

Have you ever had one of those days where you brush your teeth 5 times without realizing it?

Because, I just had one of those days.

While I was brushing my teeth (5 minutes ago), I ran through all the activities I did today. I woke up late, drank some water, I brushed my teeth, I watched an episode of Scrubs, I brushed my teeth, I chatted it up with a housemate, I took a shower, I brushed my teeth, I....wait. WTF?

Yea. I brushed my teeth three fuckin' times this morning.

WHO THE FUCK DOES THIS HAPPEN TO?!? Am I that dumb and clueless? How did I manage to brush my teeth 3 fuckin' times in the morning and not realize this until now?!

So, there I was, brushing my teeth, in awe at the human mind's ability to have really bad memory, when I realized that it was 4AM. 'Shit, it's late. What did I do for the last 4 hours?' 'Let's see. I ate some late night chips (fries, for you Brit-challenged), ate a piece of cheese, brushed my teeth, watched Jay and Silent Bob Strikes Back, and...fuck.' I did it again.

I BRUSHED MY TEETH 5 TIMES TODAY.

WHAT
THE FUCK.

*sigh*

Monkey Suite

I think I'm addicted to chocolate.

So, during Easter, Cadbury goes crazy and sells their chocolate eggs right?

Well, they were on sale at Tesco, so I made my housemate buy me some while she was there. I mean, you can't pass up a sale on chocolate. No human being can hear of a chocolate sale and go 'Nah, I'll pass on that. Buy me some healthy stuff like mushrooms and beets.' GET THE FUCK OUTTA HEA. IT'S CHOCOLATE FOO. Anyway.

This was....a week ago?

She bought me 4 Cadbury Chocolate Eggs, which were hallow. All of them had treats inside, which was, of course, more chocolate.

These things are huge. Seriously. FUCKING HUGE. Or I should say, WERE huge. Ha...

So. That was last week.

Time has tumbleweeded on.

Today. 2:04AM, the 26th of March, year 2007.

I vanquished the last half of a hallow Cadbury Chocolate Easter Egg.

AND IT WAS DELICIOUS.

Forget the fact that these things have a huge calorie count and can probably kill a small cow.
Forget the fact that these things were enjoyed with an alcoholic beverage.
and forget the fact that it's fucking 2AM in the morning and I'm eating chocolate while watching MY SASSY GIRL.

Bah.

I'll go back to watching mushy korean movies.

I'll never get any studying done.

Fuck you chocolate.

..(I would if I could)

So Far To Go

My immune system likes to fuck around with me.

It has a sick personality. (GET IT?! Ha.)

I couldn't sleep all night. It was cold as fuck and my head was killin' me.

I don't understand why I keep getting sick randomly. I eat healthy, I do some exercising and I don't smoke and/or drink (a lot).

I swear, I must be getting bacteria from the cutlery or plates that I'm using, because I can't see any other explanations for this madness.

Or the food I'm buying isn't as organic as I thought.

I don't know.

I'm going to hit the B E D and sleep a little longer.

What a good start to spring.

Powderfinger

Half Nelson.

Go watch this. The most organic cinema I've seen in a long while.

Ryan Gosling is going to do big things with his career.

Playa Playa

I almost got in a fight on the bus today.

Two drunken English boys fucking around with racial statements does not please Jason.

I went to town with my housemate and two friends.

It was quite boring (and expensive).

One had boy problems, one had girl problems and the other one was too busy with another boy.

I was quite bored, being the only one single and not having problems with the opposite gender.

Clubs are overrated.

ps: Brit's don't have rhythm.

No Greater Love

Spring and Break. Two beautiful entities. However, by their powers combined, they form an even more beautiful entity. After hours of glorious lovemaking, they created SPRINGBREAK.

Thus, SPRINGBREAK was born.

SPRINGBREAK lived her life as if she was born anew everyday. Her presence is quite unlike anything else I've experienced.

I started dating her today. I actually noticed her a couple of weeks ago, from far away, but was too nervous to approach. I was unprepared, unfocused and undressed. iJoke about the last one.

We had fun today. We went out to the Woodys, the village pub, and had a couple of pints and about 4 Jack&Cokes. Talked about the most random shit ever (Sci-Fi shit and Eminem?) while watching Talledega Nights (which was fucking horrible. Both of us agreed.)

After the pub, I saw her off to her flat and came back to my room.

Here I am.

Ah. (I'm tipsy as a mothafucka, so if this entry was lame..then I'm sorry. ahaha)

(Let us drink, be merry and kill our brain cells.)

I Still Love H.E.R.

I know I talked about how I don't agree with some things that go on in Hip Hop culture...

but damn.

These past few years have been GREAT for Hip Hop.

It's 2007. March, 22nd. There are about...8 albums that have come out, which are on constant rotation by me. Those are just the GREAT ones too.

I LOVE IT. I LOVE THIS SHIT. Today, on the bus, I was listening to Redman's mixtape (for the umpfh time) and I was getting soooo hyped. There was this old lady with too much old lady perfume sitting next to me. I wanted to smack her. That's what Redman does. Oh man. I know that seems really violent and whanot, but you just have to listen and love his aggressive style to understand. He makes me want to get in fights for no reason and start insultin people while smoking a joint. AND ON TOP OF THAT, he comes with the sickest lines ever.

I can't even sleep right now because I have his album on rotation.

and people complain and moan, saying Hip Hop is dead. MAN PLEASE. You ain't lookin hard enough. Ya'll don't even listen to the lyrics anymore, huh? Just the beats.

Hip Hop is alive and well. GREAT albums/mixtapes/EP's/remixes are being released every day/week from the mainstream and from the underground communities.

Besides, don't be one of those snobs who won't listen to mainstream Hip Hop music, thinking it's all trash. IT'S NOT. Besides, ya'll know you love to dance to those addictive club bangers.

STOP SLEEPIN YO.

Those Things

I didn't even drink that much last night, yet I feel very hungover.

Well, I did drink a lot....cause I can't seem to find my money.

I don't understand hangovers. I get them more often when I've drank just to the point of getting DRUNK (not drunk. DRUNK.) If I go crazy and have a shitload of alcohol, I don't usually get hangovers the next day. I'm assuming that daily waking stress and/or tiredness could have a significant effect because I was extremely exhausted yesterday, pre-goingouttotownanddrinking.

Who wants to explain the anatomy of a hangover to me? haha.

or I could just google it...but no.

FOOD AWAITS!

ps: Spring break starts for me this thursday. Wooo. I love spring.

Space MAN

What exactly defines masculinity?

Earlier today, I watched a film done on Hip-Hip and the masculinity of the black man in America. While I'm not a black man in America, I was intriguied by the question that this film brought up. What is masculinity and how do we define it?

When I was younger (more like, during high school), I always took horrible yet fun personality tests in hopes of somehow trying to understand a bit more about myself. I remember one distinct test I took in speech, where Kunal & I came out as the most feminine personalities in the entire class. Kunal beat me out by 3 points, but still, I was quite surprised. This test was telling me that my personality traits were stereotypically feminine and I showed almost no sign of masculinity. BOO I say. BOO. Honestly though, I was quite pleased with myself at the time. Shit, I prouded myself as being a nice guy. That's all I could be back in the day. I don't know why, now that I think about it. I think that I felt like being a nice guy would get me farther in life, farther with school and farther with ladies. However, I wasn't really a nice guy. I think there were a lot of situations where I wanted to express myself, but I would put those feelings six feet under and played the role of a nice guy. (Disclaimer: Friends, this role did not take part with you. This is the role I played with almost everyone else though.) Anyway. I never felt like a MAN. My dad would occasionally say shit that would test my masculinity and I would almost always fail the test. Haha. Anyway. The 'feminine' personality traits and the nice guy role really made me question my masculinity as a teenage male.

I've matured a lot since then (no ego-o). Now, I don't play no role. I still take personality tests because they are fun, but honestly, I know myself more than what the MMCI, Rorshach or DSM-IV could ever tell me. I look back on myself and realize that I was a BOY. A child. I'm not sayin that I'm the definition of masculinity now, but I think I'm close, closer than I've ever been. So the question that needs to be answered here is, what is my definition of masculinity? I'm just going to point out two main aspects, because a lot of other traits of masculinity can fit under these.

- CONFIDENCE. Being, knowing and loving yourself. I'm confident about my choices, which allows me to be confident in myself. I don't need to portray some fake thug image (even though I may cuss like one), I don't need to be emo or hipster or indie and I don't need to lie about how I feel. (I'm not saying you aren't a man if you fit with these crowds, so don't get it twisted. This is my subjective view from my own personal experience.) The confidence also lets me be introspective, giving me infinite room to grow as a man, as a human, so that I can express myself as I please, instead of having to follow the trends of popular culture's view of masculinity. Shit. I don't need to look like Brad Pitt to feel good about myself. OWN YOURSELF. My motto in life right now is, 'Do you.' Do you and everything will fall in place. I wasn't what you could call a 'confident young lad' back in the day. Actually, I was bloody insecure.
- RESPONSIBILITY. This might come off as old fashioned, but I think responsibility is an important factor in growing as a man. Being responsible for your actions as a male. I see a lot of guys my age who can't seem to grasp the idea of responsibility. Whether they are white or asian, their minds seem to be somewhere else, which really limits them, mentally. This is a vague aspect though. Responsibility for what, right? Everything, I suppose. I think this is another reason why I would definitely want a family in the future. They say that boys become men after they learn the responsibilities of raising children. I most definitely think theres truth to that. And no, I don't want children for the sake of my own growth. I want a family because I think one of the greatest responsibilites a person could have is to raise a child. In our modern society, this might not be the case for some people, since our views about norms such as marriage and family are ever-evolving. However, after being raised by my parents and watching a countless number of other parents raising their children and working hard for a cohesive family unit, I can't pinpoint anything else that would/could be more rewarding. I guess the question I would ask myself is "What kind of man would I be if I ran from adversity?"

I realized that I come off as a crazy old fashioned korean man. Hahahaha.

I'm still young. Mad young. I have a lot of time to experience new things and develop schemas about life. My view on masculinity will change later on. That's the beauty of it though. It WILL change.

While writing this however, I kept thinking to myself, 'Well what about femininity? Men aren't the only ones that should be confident and responsible.'

Then I realized that whether you are a man or woman, you should always strive for these qualities. I just put a male spin on confidence and responsibility, because thats how I see the world, as a male.

*I just wanted to add one more thing. This was discussed in the film as well.
This is hard for me, because I love Hip-Hop, but I get real sick of the misogyny in music at times. Objectifing women in music videos and songs have created such a negative impact on society. When men think of women, what automatically comes up first? Sex. This is a whole different post in the making, but I just wanted to point that out. Fellas, we gotta respect the women. Women = creation. We wouldn't be here if it weren't for them, yet you wouldn't think or know that if you pay attention to the media and it's oversexed use of women.*

I'm just doing me.

Go Out Clothes

I must be the only study abroad student who won't come back to the states with a thousand stories about drunken nights where I did this and did that until this happened, leading me to pass out and wake up hung over, just to do it all again.

Either I, somehow, don't let myself partake in social functions, or I just don't give a fuck.

I'll go with the latter.

Besides, I'm too poor to be the average study abroad student.

I get by with 100 pounds a month. Think of it as getting by with 100 dollars a month.

Yep.

Paying for next term's rent and bus pass will leave me with 200pounds to spend.

Ha.

PIMPOINT.

St. Patrick's Day.

+

England vs. Wales Rugby Day.

=

Essay Day.

*tear*

PS: I'm never eating Pizza Hut pizza again. I feel so groggy and lazy.
PS2: Heineken is tasty.
PS3: Why am I listening to Korean music? (Clazziquai Project owns.)

Big Poppa.

Um...

Self portraits. They are not that great. It's hard to take pictures of yourself. How do myspace mothafuckas do this shit? I feel like such a camera gangsta. *runs*

Walk It Out

*Pictures x-posted on Facebook*

The weather was great. There was sun, warm weather and a gentle breeze. My pictures, however, aren't that great. It's okay though. I had a good climbing session along the coast and had fun chatting it up with my mates. Here are some pictures.

One Minute More

The Photography Society I'm in has asked most of the active photographers to submit photos for a gallery.

I have no idea what photos I want to submit.

Help me?

If you liked any particular photo from my facebook, blog, or deviantart (check the links on the side), please tell me, so I can consider it for submission. I'll try to upload more onto my deviantart site so that you can check them out. However, this won't be done till tomorrow, since I'm a bit tipsy and in need of sleep.

'You are your own worst critic.'

It's true. All my pictures look like shit to me right now.

Anyway, thanks.

Oh. My photo nerds and I went on a coastal walk along Mumbles today. Dangerous rocks and rising tides equals good times. I'll post up some pictures on my next update, but it wasn't a good session today. Even though I welcomed the warm weather and the sun, there was too much sun for any good shots of the bay. Oh, I'll also upload some of the self portraits.

Don't expect a lot. Haha.

Camera/Gangsta

I want people to model for me so I can practice and hopefully enhance my portrait taking skills.

However, it's not easy to ask people, 'Will you model for me and let me take invasive pictures of you with my camera? Of course, you will get no cash money benjamins from this, but you will get added to my photography collection that others will look at and judge. Oh, I will make you look purrty too.'

I have no models, so for the past half hour, I've been practicing on myself.

Right before I decided to post this entry, I was testing out the white balance and ISO settings on this Nikon D50 on my face and shadows on the wall.

Then I realized what I was doing.

I feel like such a camera whore. I have about 40 pictures on this camera of myself doing random faces and tilting my head in awkward directions.

I know what you're thinking. 'You know you love it Jason, you camera whore.'

I swear, I was doing random faces because I knew no one else would see these and I was tilting my head because I wanted to see the different effects I could get from the ceiling light.

I SWEAR. DON'T QUESTION ME GODDAMNIT.

(But I do look pretty gangsta in some of these. A Preppy/Nerdy Gangsta.)

Anyway...

I need models. Please model for me. I'll buy you a drink and make you a tuna sandwich. I swear. I won't let you down. MODEL FOR ME!!!! MALE OR FEMALE!! (preferably female, because I like them. However, males are definitely welcome. EQUAL RIGHTS FOR MODELS I SAY!

S(e)oul Food.

I made Kimchi Jjigae (again), with the canned kimchi my parents sent me. This shit expires in the year 2011. It tastes horrible out of the can, but once it's in some boiling water with veggies, it tastes amazing. ahah. Honestly....while I was devouring the stew, I thought to myself, 'This is what HEAVEN feels like. This is what an INTENSE, BLINDING ORGASM feels like.'

It's true what they say about the food you grew up with. I can't imagine myself living without Korean food. I DON'T want to imagine myself living without Korean food. The casseroles, the stews, the side dishes, the soju and everything else makes life worth living.

This intense love has made me realize something. I have to learn how to cook Korean food for my survival in this world. (Or I could marry a Korean girl, but do Korean girls even know how to cook these days? *runs and ducks behind a sofa* No offense to my Korean sistas.)

When I go back to the states, I'm going to master Korean cooking. You hear me?! I WILL MASTER KOREAN COOKING. Once I master it, I will cook some food for yall and then we can celebrate the joyous food with Soju and cheesecake.

and saix.

iJoke.

I love Korean. FOOD. Culture. History. WOMEN.